Talent Scout #8.

Titus Bramble
aka. What a Bramble
aka. Why, Bramble, Why?

The Rock in the Toons defence, Titus Bramble is a sharp eyed ruthless footballer. Always taking the play of the game to his advantage, Bramble uses his oversised head to steer newcastle to an important victory, or indeed, to an unfortunate defeat.

Titus came through Newcastle's acadamy, and as Keegan put it, "this boy will be a European star". His star shone quickly, and Titus was soon in the England under-21's. However, he was confined to the defence, and as Newcastle had such a great attacking force, yet a shallow defence, Brable could not grow and further. However, Bramble's prayers of a new skilled defensive idol were come true in 2005 with the coming of Jean-Alain Boumsong. Bramble then learnt how to do skilled tackes to end their runs into the penalty box before a corner kick, and end their careers with brilliant tackles showing brambles physical manouverability.

Bramble came into attention from The Sam in a friendly game with the Wellington team in late 2005. Newcastle were leading 2-1 at the hour mark thanks to two brilliant shots by Albert Luque, and The Sam had got one back through Geoffrey Wong. The Sam defender Arthur performed a wonderfull run through Bowyer and Dyer, and was one-on-one with harper, when out of no-where, Bramble swung his foot, and sent Arthur out of football for eight months with a fractured ankle. Boumsong appauded wildly, but the crowd was silent.

Bramble has been sent off no less than 8 times for newcastle, and he is striving for more, with all his skills refreshed. His best times come from freekick situations, when he lets Given/Harper do all the work in marking the lethal player. He is very skilled in knowing what players are not a threat (eg, Cahill, Bullard, Kuyt, Giggs, Ronaldo, you get the picture).

The Sam is interested in Bramble as they have gone for the aggressive approach this year, and Bramble fits right in.

Talent Scout #7

Benjamin Mwaruwari
aka BENJANI

Nationality: Zimbabwe
Club: Portsmouth

Not since Samuel Eto'o from Cameroon made his mark in the Spanish League has an African player made such an impact on a football league.

Benjani, of Portsmouth in the English Premier League has become a living legend since arriving in Pompey for a record transfer fee.

He found life tough at first, after turning to Emile Heskey for goal scoring advice. Nobody told him that the former Liverpool striker had horrible finishing. To make matters worse, the Sky Sport commentators coudn't even say his proper name 'Mwaruwari' and so they named him 'Benjani', a name most people laugh at.

Things changed this year though. Benjani is scoring goals like crazy and everywhere football fans are buying him for their Fantasy Prem team.

Some say the change was due to the arrival of another African to partner him in attack, Kanu of Nigeria. However Benjani has told media that there were other reasons.

'I practised Bum Joon shots with The Sam by hanging from a bar in the long room', the Zimbabwean striker told Goal.com.

Portsmouth are flying high in the Premier League at the moment and if Benjani continues his goalscoring form, I will make him my captain on Fantasy Prem...oh, and Portsmouth will get into Europe.